![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Lately I've been busy and happy. I'm quickly learning that I don't do well with down time. Taking care of one's self and having time for rest is important, but I'm such a hesitator that if I have too much time to think, I can't seem to get up again. Last week I couldn't muster the energy to do anything no matter how much free time I had and I was completely drained, and yet this week I think I've spent maybe 5 minutes at home all week and I've never been happier and more refreshed. I guess I need to stick to the college approach - being gone from AM to PM makes Steph a regimented and happy woman.
Out of nowhere the other day I got the idea of visiting 2-3 classes during every lunch period to teach them a new idiom of phrase. I have 12 classes, so I wouldn't be visiting them more than once a week so it wouldn't be too disruptive for them. It also has the added benefit of limiting me to 10 minutes per class, which is just short enough of a duration that I'm able to fend off the awkwardness goblins native to the Japanese countryside.
To prepare for this, I spent the entire morning on Monday weeding through camp songs and chants. I found some pretty good ones amidst the cheesiness, but had to narrow them down further because often the language is just too difficult and punny to make sense. I have some longer ones I'll teach them over the course of a week or so, but for this week I started with, "What's up?" with answers like, "Not much," or "I'm eating lunch." Some kids are even smart enough to think of their own answers! It's a great arrangement because 1) it makes me feel like I'm doing my job, 2) the students like it, and 3) it gives me something to do! Not having a lot of face time with the students really hurts our relationship. Turns out lunch is when I get a captive audience, since they all eat in their classrooms!
Overall, I just feel good. I'm not getting much more sleep, much to my chagrin, but I'm running, sleeping well when I do sleep, and eating well. There's also the added bonus of life running smoothly. I'm making a point of utilizing the Japanese people around me who speak English, and I've had some very fluent conversations with people in Japanese too, from the new lunch lady to my hairdresser. I know I've said it before but I can't begin to describe the satisfaction that comes from a successful encounter in Japanese.
On Monday I took a (useless) placement test for my Japanese class at the tech school that starts next week. I biked there and arrived in time for passing period. The passing period experience almost knocked the wind out of me though. YOUNG PEOPLE. YOUNG PEOPLE EVERYWHERE. Since college I haven't seen more than one young strangers at a time and at that only every 2-3 weeks. Part of me was thrilled and excited for my future possibilities, but most of me was absolutely terrified. All I ever see are high schoolers and old people.
On Tuesday I got a haircut (hence the successful conversation with a hairdresser) and then rushed straight off to dinner with Naomi. She and I haven't spent much time together before now, but she needed a native English speaker to check over some speeches she'd written and we've been kind of meaning to get to know each other anyway. She took me to this great restaurant downtown, Japanese style at my request, and I learned ever more about eating in Japan. She spent a year in Australia and a year in Canada so she's pretty much fluent, but she also incorporates a lot of Japanese which is good for me, of course. It was a really easy conversation because whenever things would get too difficult for us we'd switch to our native languages and together we could parce out the meaning. I had such a good time that I invited her to eat with us when the Jackles comes to visit and we all go to the famous yakitori place.
Yesterday I had our second international club meeting for the school year and I was blessed with the chance to actually lead the club because the president was taking a test. I'd had all these great activities planned and then at the last minute again the club president pulled his, "...I don't know...maybe we should just do *boring thing* instead..." I really like him a lot, but he always poo-poos my ideas and then makes things really dry, then when we're at club he's like, "Uh...do you have any ideas?" and I'm left floundering. I can never quite tell what's on his mind and everything I say gets a leery look, even when I try to pander to him. At this chance, however, we got to play some fun name games I'd learned as an RA and I found myself actually able to joke and talk and play with the students instead of being the awkward boring lump I was reduced to during our first meeting.
The meeting was further enhanced by my resolve. Since the new year had started, the third years (last year's second years) decided to grace us with their presence again, which includes the mean girl who wears bleeding bear teeth on the weekends (see the entry in which I write about the mean girl who made me cry). I just don't like her. She's pushy. I felt like she ruined club last week even more than the boring president did, and all the younger kids are afraid of her. Finally I realized I was letting her bully me too, and if it's going to be a battle of wills I think the baller always wins. The only thing scarier than a batshit crazy girl is, well, an insulted, perfectionist Steph.
I walked into the room yesterday and I made some small talk with her to be nice (since she was dominating the rest of the group anyway and I wasn't gonna get anywhere with anyone else). I told her her sweater was "bright," at which point she responded in Japanese (she always does) and kept repeating the Japanese word for bright. I'd gone in not looking for a fight, but when I realized what she was doing, the fire inside me screamed "Bitch, I KNOW you are NOT trying to teach me a word. So I looked her in the eye and for every time she said "hade" I said "bright," until she finally said, "a! bright desu ka? bright!"
That's what I thought.
I think the new second years are following in my shoes too. They know I prefer them over the third years and each day they're becoming a little more and more obstinant. I know they won't surpass the senior/junior hierarchy, but at least they can be people again. Speaking of the hierarchy, I noticed something fascinating while we were learning each other's names. There were about 10 new freshmen, 8 second years, and 5 third years. Obviously most of the second and third years knew each other and had an advantage, but when it came to new names they responded like you'd expect - remembering some, forgetting others, but by and large being graceful about it even if they forgot names of the people in their same grade.
The first years, however, were amazing. After the first introduction, no matter how fast or mumbly, they all managed to remember every one of the upperclassmen's names and attach -sempai to the end for respect. When it came to each other, however, they literally did not remember a single soul's name even after screwing up the same name 4 times in the course of 10 minutes. I don't know if it's because they sunk all their energy into learning their seniors names or if it's a power struggle thing among their peers - like, I don't remember you, so I am superior. That seems pretty extreme and brutal, but I just can't believe the completely perfect polarity with which they divided their memories. Anyway, it was fun and I'm optimistic for the future. I'm finally being who I want and having the relationships I want, in spite of all the obstacles laid against me.
After international club I ran across town for adult English conversation. It was another successful lesson, complete with bonding and a dinner afterwards. My dinner was huge and not overly delicious, but it was free and it was fun. Turns out they're talking about moving the location so that it's within walking distance of my house. That would be awesome, but I don't want to inconvenience anyone. I did get a little annoyed though when they kept turning to me and being like, "Seriously, Steph, give us your real opinion on this. It's ok." Not only was I already giving my real opinion, but it bothers me that a foreigner should be expected to give her opinion while the room full of Japanese people can continue their charades. Though I don't like pussyfooting around, I too would've obscured my feelings a little if they were any more negative, in Japan or in America, but it's kind of ridicluous that I should be expected to behave differently when we're all trying to work together.
I've got less than an hour or two of free time every day from tomorrow until May 13th, but I'm quite pleased about it. Makes me wonder why I hate inactivity so much - do I get bored without realizing I'm bored? Do I feel guilt for unproductivity? Is it my worrying? Is my busyness a welcome distraction from the weight of the universe? Is it the promise of excitement? What?
In spite of my limited hobby time, I've been dying for a Japanese art form since I got here and I've been feeling a lot of guilt about not picking one up. There's no excuse for living in a foreign country for two years without adding something cool to your skill set. Yet, with what free time am I supposed to pick something up? Well, I've solved the problem. I've decided that while some of my friends are spending their time with tea ceremony, kendo, or Japanese archery, I'm going to be imbibing.
I'm going to learn the art of Nihonshu (sake). It'd be best if I had a human guide for my journey, and maybe I'll find one, but for now I'm just trying as much as I can, remembering the names of what I've had to drink, and spending huge chunks of time reading about sake and its various categories on the internet. The best way to combat a time crunch is to choose something you like so much that you do it naturally whether you have the time or not. Gourmet drinking and eating are two of those things for me.
Also I've got the cooking thing going for me. I'm learning an awful lot about food, how to prepare it, how to eat it, and how to enjoy it. I really, really want to learn how to make Japanese sweets someday too. I also still intend to ask around about Ikebana, the art of floral arrangment, but until I find a teacher I will be at rest knowing I've got The Drink.
To make matters better, the new lunch lady, shy of me though she is, told me today that she's begun ordering an extra katsujuu lunch on Thursdays so ensure I always get one, because she knows I like them and that I always come on Thursdays. Even if it means I'll be subjecting my body to fried pork chops every Thursday for the rest of my stay in Japan, it's a really nice feeling to know that someone is looking out for me.
Out of nowhere the other day I got the idea of visiting 2-3 classes during every lunch period to teach them a new idiom of phrase. I have 12 classes, so I wouldn't be visiting them more than once a week so it wouldn't be too disruptive for them. It also has the added benefit of limiting me to 10 minutes per class, which is just short enough of a duration that I'm able to fend off the awkwardness goblins native to the Japanese countryside.
To prepare for this, I spent the entire morning on Monday weeding through camp songs and chants. I found some pretty good ones amidst the cheesiness, but had to narrow them down further because often the language is just too difficult and punny to make sense. I have some longer ones I'll teach them over the course of a week or so, but for this week I started with, "What's up?" with answers like, "Not much," or "I'm eating lunch." Some kids are even smart enough to think of their own answers! It's a great arrangement because 1) it makes me feel like I'm doing my job, 2) the students like it, and 3) it gives me something to do! Not having a lot of face time with the students really hurts our relationship. Turns out lunch is when I get a captive audience, since they all eat in their classrooms!
Overall, I just feel good. I'm not getting much more sleep, much to my chagrin, but I'm running, sleeping well when I do sleep, and eating well. There's also the added bonus of life running smoothly. I'm making a point of utilizing the Japanese people around me who speak English, and I've had some very fluent conversations with people in Japanese too, from the new lunch lady to my hairdresser. I know I've said it before but I can't begin to describe the satisfaction that comes from a successful encounter in Japanese.
On Monday I took a (useless) placement test for my Japanese class at the tech school that starts next week. I biked there and arrived in time for passing period. The passing period experience almost knocked the wind out of me though. YOUNG PEOPLE. YOUNG PEOPLE EVERYWHERE. Since college I haven't seen more than one young strangers at a time and at that only every 2-3 weeks. Part of me was thrilled and excited for my future possibilities, but most of me was absolutely terrified. All I ever see are high schoolers and old people.
On Tuesday I got a haircut (hence the successful conversation with a hairdresser) and then rushed straight off to dinner with Naomi. She and I haven't spent much time together before now, but she needed a native English speaker to check over some speeches she'd written and we've been kind of meaning to get to know each other anyway. She took me to this great restaurant downtown, Japanese style at my request, and I learned ever more about eating in Japan. She spent a year in Australia and a year in Canada so she's pretty much fluent, but she also incorporates a lot of Japanese which is good for me, of course. It was a really easy conversation because whenever things would get too difficult for us we'd switch to our native languages and together we could parce out the meaning. I had such a good time that I invited her to eat with us when the Jackles comes to visit and we all go to the famous yakitori place.
Yesterday I had our second international club meeting for the school year and I was blessed with the chance to actually lead the club because the president was taking a test. I'd had all these great activities planned and then at the last minute again the club president pulled his, "...I don't know...maybe we should just do *boring thing* instead..." I really like him a lot, but he always poo-poos my ideas and then makes things really dry, then when we're at club he's like, "Uh...do you have any ideas?" and I'm left floundering. I can never quite tell what's on his mind and everything I say gets a leery look, even when I try to pander to him. At this chance, however, we got to play some fun name games I'd learned as an RA and I found myself actually able to joke and talk and play with the students instead of being the awkward boring lump I was reduced to during our first meeting.
The meeting was further enhanced by my resolve. Since the new year had started, the third years (last year's second years) decided to grace us with their presence again, which includes the mean girl who wears bleeding bear teeth on the weekends (see the entry in which I write about the mean girl who made me cry). I just don't like her. She's pushy. I felt like she ruined club last week even more than the boring president did, and all the younger kids are afraid of her. Finally I realized I was letting her bully me too, and if it's going to be a battle of wills I think the baller always wins. The only thing scarier than a batshit crazy girl is, well, an insulted, perfectionist Steph.
I walked into the room yesterday and I made some small talk with her to be nice (since she was dominating the rest of the group anyway and I wasn't gonna get anywhere with anyone else). I told her her sweater was "bright," at which point she responded in Japanese (she always does) and kept repeating the Japanese word for bright. I'd gone in not looking for a fight, but when I realized what she was doing, the fire inside me screamed "Bitch, I KNOW you are NOT trying to teach me a word. So I looked her in the eye and for every time she said "hade" I said "bright," until she finally said, "a! bright desu ka? bright!"
That's what I thought.
I think the new second years are following in my shoes too. They know I prefer them over the third years and each day they're becoming a little more and more obstinant. I know they won't surpass the senior/junior hierarchy, but at least they can be people again. Speaking of the hierarchy, I noticed something fascinating while we were learning each other's names. There were about 10 new freshmen, 8 second years, and 5 third years. Obviously most of the second and third years knew each other and had an advantage, but when it came to new names they responded like you'd expect - remembering some, forgetting others, but by and large being graceful about it even if they forgot names of the people in their same grade.
The first years, however, were amazing. After the first introduction, no matter how fast or mumbly, they all managed to remember every one of the upperclassmen's names and attach -sempai to the end for respect. When it came to each other, however, they literally did not remember a single soul's name even after screwing up the same name 4 times in the course of 10 minutes. I don't know if it's because they sunk all their energy into learning their seniors names or if it's a power struggle thing among their peers - like, I don't remember you, so I am superior. That seems pretty extreme and brutal, but I just can't believe the completely perfect polarity with which they divided their memories. Anyway, it was fun and I'm optimistic for the future. I'm finally being who I want and having the relationships I want, in spite of all the obstacles laid against me.
After international club I ran across town for adult English conversation. It was another successful lesson, complete with bonding and a dinner afterwards. My dinner was huge and not overly delicious, but it was free and it was fun. Turns out they're talking about moving the location so that it's within walking distance of my house. That would be awesome, but I don't want to inconvenience anyone. I did get a little annoyed though when they kept turning to me and being like, "Seriously, Steph, give us your real opinion on this. It's ok." Not only was I already giving my real opinion, but it bothers me that a foreigner should be expected to give her opinion while the room full of Japanese people can continue their charades. Though I don't like pussyfooting around, I too would've obscured my feelings a little if they were any more negative, in Japan or in America, but it's kind of ridicluous that I should be expected to behave differently when we're all trying to work together.
I've got less than an hour or two of free time every day from tomorrow until May 13th, but I'm quite pleased about it. Makes me wonder why I hate inactivity so much - do I get bored without realizing I'm bored? Do I feel guilt for unproductivity? Is it my worrying? Is my busyness a welcome distraction from the weight of the universe? Is it the promise of excitement? What?
In spite of my limited hobby time, I've been dying for a Japanese art form since I got here and I've been feeling a lot of guilt about not picking one up. There's no excuse for living in a foreign country for two years without adding something cool to your skill set. Yet, with what free time am I supposed to pick something up? Well, I've solved the problem. I've decided that while some of my friends are spending their time with tea ceremony, kendo, or Japanese archery, I'm going to be imbibing.
I'm going to learn the art of Nihonshu (sake). It'd be best if I had a human guide for my journey, and maybe I'll find one, but for now I'm just trying as much as I can, remembering the names of what I've had to drink, and spending huge chunks of time reading about sake and its various categories on the internet. The best way to combat a time crunch is to choose something you like so much that you do it naturally whether you have the time or not. Gourmet drinking and eating are two of those things for me.
Also I've got the cooking thing going for me. I'm learning an awful lot about food, how to prepare it, how to eat it, and how to enjoy it. I really, really want to learn how to make Japanese sweets someday too. I also still intend to ask around about Ikebana, the art of floral arrangment, but until I find a teacher I will be at rest knowing I've got The Drink.
To make matters better, the new lunch lady, shy of me though she is, told me today that she's begun ordering an extra katsujuu lunch on Thursdays so ensure I always get one, because she knows I like them and that I always come on Thursdays. Even if it means I'll be subjecting my body to fried pork chops every Thursday for the rest of my stay in Japan, it's a really nice feeling to know that someone is looking out for me.
Tags: